So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

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Linkman
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So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Linkman » Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:04 pm

Remember a while back we had a topic where we asked ourselves where we wanted to be in a few years? I can't find it. Nor does it matter.

Look at yourself in 2010. Think how you were then. What you wanted to achieve. Did it happen? What happened that you didn't anticipate at all? Are you a better person than then?

And... where do you see yourself five years from now?
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by MysteriousLad » Fri Jul 24, 2015 4:45 pm

I don't know what I wanted to do five years ago but I hope to be graduating in 5 years.
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Airnike » Fri Jul 24, 2015 5:25 pm

In 2010, I started uni.
In 2015, I'm a repeat student and a dropout, and I didn't get what I went there for.

Nothing changed.

Now this is the topic of ANGST.
MysteriousLad be like:
Oh hello, I am MysteriousLad.
Do you know when I was an OP player? When I wasn't in WWN and massclaims were legit good? Yea I miss the days I could force town to claim, rout out the mafia, and win the game for free day 3. Sometimes without being killed!
Senpai HPD notices me everyday when I'm town, do no scum play, and still get lynched day 1.
Anyway, it's time to go and ask people to claim and go lynch those who don't with my high-skill OP role.
I am MysteriousLad.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Dragonite » Fri Jul 24, 2015 6:46 pm

Yeah, this topic is just goading us to be DRAMATIC. You have been warned.

Anyway, If I look specifically at 2010.. That was the best year of the last 7 for me. (since I count pretty much everything from the fall 2008 point) I managed to get past high school, and I took control of my own sanity and views.
viewtopic.php?f=23&t=12130 Just look at this, it's been exactly 5 years, and yeah, improved in that regard.

And no luck in love yet, sorry.

I might be more mature then I was then, but I don't really feel like a better person, and didn't really see all the insecurity about my own abilities coming.I'm 23 and don't feel like I managed to get the most about the past few years. I regret quite a bit of things, although a lot of it isn't my fault. It isn't so much those past 5 years are the problem, it's more like the past 2(almost down to the date again) have been very unfulfilling and have me thrown off-balance.

My future is looking good though, even though I have some trouble feeling that way emotionally yet. Hoping that in another 5 years, my life is more balanced/on track and stuff cliched blah blah.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by MysteriousLad » Fri Jul 24, 2015 8:45 pm

Oh I'd also like to be living out of Europe.
Preferably Asia

This sounds sarcastic but its true
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"rocks fall everyone dies" ~HPD
Welcome to the optimistic world of WWN :D

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Sven » Fri Jul 24, 2015 9:43 pm

mlad five years ago was like 9 lol

at 19 i thought you should try to be absolutely perfect at the things you cared about or not bother trying at all. most of my goals were achieved in the span of weeks or months. but if the goal was more open ended and long term i tended to give up after those few months. i hoped that future me would be able to figure the more open ended goal stuff out. above all i wanted to know what skill really meant and how i could become skilled at the things i cared about.

at 24 i haven't really figured the open ended goal stuff out perfectly. you can see the exercise topic for a pretty good example. i went from couch potato to running 10k+ a day in about two months. i would tell people about the amount i was running if it came up, and i'd get all the congratulations and praise a fit person would get. at some point i thought i'd 'made it'. i then quickly lost the motivation i had to run. i stopped running more than once a week, then i stopped running entirely.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Treedweller » Sat Jul 25, 2015 2:35 pm

21 going on 22 Treed was a goddamn mess. Oh sure, I had good things going for me: I graduated university with excellent grades, and I guess I was a nice guy, too? But I had let most of my university years go to waste. I mistakenly believed that university was only about expanding your intellectual horizons - I had let a lot of opportunities to explore myself as a social being pass me by. That's not to say that I was devoid of social skills. But I didn't have the solid group of friends or firm grasp on my identity that so many seem to have at least started to work out by the end of their postsecondary years.

I applied to jobs in the city thinking that I'd find something rewarding that paid decent, but that turned out to be a pipiest of pipe dreams. I ended up working in retail for a stint (and I put my all into that job, even though it was the crumpets, most disheartening job I'd ever taken), then retreated to the rural job market. I found something much better than retail, and worked at that while I applied for master's programs.

All 21 going on 22 Treed knew was that a) I had woefully miscalculated and underestimated how depressingly 'real' the world outside academia was and b) I had to return to school and correct my mistakes. I didn't have clear plans about where I'd be in five years, though I did have vague and romantic ideas about ending up living in France or marrying a super rich lady/man (when they're rich, who cares?).

Both of those plans fell through because OMG I DIDN'T KNOW ANY RICH PEOPLE WHAT'S UP WITH THAT and also France is stupid expensive and I didn't speak the language well enough to, like, work there. But I got into a good master's program, where I found myself socially and centred myself intellectually. I left my old comforts behind and plunged myself into piles of books and friends. Yes, I plunged myself into piles of friends. I went out at least once a week, but tried for more. I took risks, embarrassed myself and engaged people in conversation that I normally would've ignored (or at least waited until they approached me). Every moment of embarrassment and awkwardness that I endured was worth it. I met wonderful people who I still love today, and I finally felt that I had a core group I could count on if times got tough. Plus, I realized that I wasn't only charming online - in real life, people liked me and all my flaws and quirks and loveable panache, too. Pretty neat, huh? I also realized how being painfully self-aware stunted my previous friendships: I didn't have to acknowledge every mistake I made in conversation or apologize for not being perfect (unless I hurt someone).

I also found a good job, which I accepted before I finished my master's project. That was a mistake, maybe, because it took me an extra semester to finish school. But I at least didn't have to deal with the existential dread of graduating into a jobless void, and hey, I did pass my thesis defence without revisions (the best possible outcome).

Now, 26 going on 27 Treed has a solid circle of work and non-work friends. Two friends in particular I've become very close with, and I'm grateful for every moment of happiness, debauchery, awkwardness, and strength they've given me. I have a great job with excellent benefits, two fun side gigs where I earn extra cash, and I live in a place that makes me happy. I go to the gym and play soccer every week, and I've added both biking and swimming to my athletic repertoire. I've become a good cook and I eat healthy food. I'm not ready for a relationship at the moment, but I've been seeing a lot of flattering, unsolicited romantic interest.

Things are better than 21 going on 22 Treed could've imagined. That isn't to say that my life is idyllic. I still have hard and sad and depressing days, and long is the path that I must tread before I become an entirely self-assured man. But I'm closer than I've ever been. This no long-term plan thing has been working well so far.

So instead of imagining where I'll be in five years, I'll just stick to my principles: do one thing a day out my comfort zone. Lift heavy things three times a week. Approach people for companionship, and expect to be welcomed in return. I'll see where that takes me.
Last edited by Treedweller on Sat Jul 25, 2015 3:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Treedweller » Sat Jul 25, 2015 2:47 pm

I'm really interested in hearing from you though, Linky.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Sniffit II » Sat Jul 25, 2015 5:46 pm

lol no. I have a job and instruments, but only managed to get one song fully recorded so far (although I have many more written than I'd anticipated, and I play far more instruments than I'd also anticipated). I still don't speak mandarin, I didn't end up doing a MSci - I may have screwed up about half of my degree, but I no longer sleep in a cold, mouldy room, which is rather nice, and somehow I accidentally ended up learning to code.

It's not as if I haven't achieved as much as I'd hoped, it's more that somewhere along the line, something took a massive left turn and I've just ambled along on that for a bit. I think I'm generally happier than I was, but then, that may just be the summer talking. I certainly get lower in the winter than I used to.
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Pkdragon » Sun Jul 26, 2015 6:18 am

Well considering 5 years ago I was in junior or senior years of university, which was the best time of my life...

No >_>
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Bonesy » Sun Jul 26, 2015 6:48 am

hell nope

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Linkman » Sun Jul 26, 2015 8:02 am

Treedweller wrote:I'm really interested in hearing from you though, Linky.
I know, I know. I'm trying to organize my thoughts.

What motivated me though, was this: https://www.futureme.org/ Basically it's a website where you can write an e-mail to your future self. It got me thinking.

Will write my thoughts tonight or tomorrow.
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Linkman » Mon Jul 27, 2015 12:27 pm

So! Where were you in 2010, Linky? Well, you were in uni. You had just lost like 20 kg. You were in a loving relationship. You wanted to take on the world and win.

Image

I kid, I kid! Things aren't that bad. Honest!

The main thing I envisioned and did not accomplish, I guess, was starting/getting a PhD. I still have this goal, it's just been put on hold. Maybe I'll never do it, I don't know.

On the bad side, I have not been able to keep my weight loss. I am up about 8 kg since five years ago. So not even near my old obese self, but definitely over the recommended weight. I have no idea if I'll ever go back to those sweet 72 kg where I was really happy. But it's not too bad as it is.

On the plus side, I have many things to be happy about.

I graduated as I expected, with stellar grades, as I did not expect. I also got a Masters degree which was totally not in the plans but was great experience. I now know what I do not want to do when (if) I get my PhD. I learned how to focus and develop a project by myself; I essentially taught myself how to do research and development, which I think has been very useful in my career, and will be even more in the future. The actual things I learned and researched, I doubt I'll ever look at them again.

It's a cliche, but what I got from my MSc. is a piece of paper and the reassurance that I can be focused, dedicated, and an accomplished autodidact. And that is worth more than anything books have taught me.

So how did that translate into the "real world"? Pretty well, actually! I actually began working in 2010 in a job I didn't enjoy that much. Back then I thought all jobs would be like that, but life has taught me if you are good at what you do, shower regularly, and make a conscious effort to play well with others, you are rewarded with better job opportunities. I went from that not-very-enjoyable job, to a decent-but-not-quite-there-yet job, and finally where I am now, a sweet-but-still-not-perfect job.

I went from having a lot of acquaintances, as I suppose is usual at that age, and a few good friends, to having few acquaintances and fewer incredible friends. I realize now how much deeper friendships can go--not to say my friends five years ago were bad friends or bad people, no! I just realize now how much deeper and closer I can be with my friends. Most of those I considered friends five years ago I rarely see nowadays--maybe on birthdays, or things like that. But those that have kept by my side, those who have supported me when I have been down--they have been amazing and I am so happy to say I can count on them.

About me? I think I've improved loads. Not to say I was a bad guy five years ago (I love you, you sweet little oaf), but I've definitely gotten better. I'm calmer, less grumpy, more understanding. I have had life thrust responsibility violently towards me, and I've risen up to the occasion beautifully. I am proud of myself now, and I am sure if 20-year old me could see me, he would be proud as well.

In short: I'm doing well! Not in the path I expected, but that's understandable.

What happens five years from now? Here's what I expect from you, 30-year old Linky:

- I know we wanted to be millionaires before 30, but I will settle for financial stability.
- If you are a father, I hope it is every bit as fulfilling as we hope it is.
- If you have a wife, I hope you are the best husband you can be. I hope she supports us in our endeavors as well.
- 25-year old us achieved polyglotism. I expect you to have written something publishable (even if it's not published yet), and decent mastery of a musical instrument.
- Will you please learn how to dance properly already?

I have nothing but love for you, past me, and nothing but love for you, future me. Keep going strong.
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by HPD » Mon Jul 27, 2015 4:12 pm

That was very inspiring! Thanks for sharing that, Linky!
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Alecat » Mon Jul 27, 2015 6:09 pm

Five years ago I can't remember what I imagined. I'd just graduated and easily landed myself in a job. Job was good, but the time came to move on and I'm glad I had the opportunity to move on when I did.

So I left that job a year and a half ago and now work in a small office with a couple of friends. It is very rough around the edges but I feel somewhat more relaxed in the office environment than prior. The work itself I still kinda struggle with in the same ways, but hey, it's work.

We have a house! Whoo. I filled it with things.
Still no webcomic/major original creative effort underway. Making fanart and milking that and maybe I'll make a little pocket money (to help me pay off toys)
Currently thinking I have too much underway to fit kids into my lifestyle. Content with the idea that I won't be spawning.

I dream of transitioning to four days a week at the day job and squishing the hobby commissions etc. into a work day instead of evenings/weekends. I need to prove myself that I have the discipline to keep that up though.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by hawkesnightmare » Tue Jul 28, 2015 7:13 am

Five years ago was a 15 year old Hawke. I cannot remember whether I was just getting into high school or if I was going into sophomore year. But it was high school regardless, and as such I had no ambitions. I certainly had more friends then, because I never was too good at making friendships that transcended the bounds of seeing them at school every day. Because of that, since I have graduated, I cannot think of anyone that I could run to if I was in trouble, aside from my girlfriend. I am slowly but surely gaining weight due to my sedentary lifestyle that probably stems from me having no real friends to go out and do things with. Fear not though, I am not depressed. At least, I don't think I'm depressed. From what I understand, depression can take on a few forms, but never have I gotten out of bed and feeling like a pile of crumpets, so I'll count that as a plus. I am not currently taking any classes for college, but I am setting the framework to, and I hope to have some sort of degree in a few years that I can feel proud about. All in all, I can't tell if my life is going steady or if it is going downhill so slowly that I don't notice it. I have a stable job, a girlfriend that loves me (at least I hope she does) and a place to stay. That's more than I could have hoped for when I was in high school.
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by MobiusReactor » Tue Jul 28, 2015 11:12 am

I have a small enough post count that I could find the old topic pretty easily, for anyone who's curious: viewtopic.php?f=23&t=12229

My only real goal from that topic was to do well in exams and get into uni, which I managed to do (Going into 3rd year of MEng Comp Sci after summer), so I succeeded in that regard. Going by my old posts, I look like I was an immature idiot back then, so hopefully I've improved upon that too.

In general, my life is currently in pretty reasonable shape. I'm doing pretty well in uni and I'm enjoying my course. I do feel like I wasted a year though, was originally doing an Applied Chemistry and Chemical Engineering degree, but changed after my first year because I wasn't enjoying it. Definitely glad I got the opportunity to change though, even if it did set me back a year. I have a decent source of income from my part-time job to support me through uni, until I can move on to something better. Despite uni being stereotypically one of the most sociable parts of people's lives, I'm too much of an introvert for that crumpets, so my circle of friends perhaps isn't as wide as I'd like, but the friends in that circle are particularly close, which is nice. My ex and I weren't officially living together, but we were together often enough that we may as well have been, so having to go back to living here full-time feels somewhat like a loss of independence, which isn't ideal.

In three years time, I'll have completed my Masters, so in five, I'll hopefully have a job relating to my degree. Either that, or I'll be working on a PhD, if I find a particular area that interests me enough to go for one, still haven't really decided what exactly I want to do post-uni yet. Part of my course involves a paid work placement over summer, so that might provide some insight into what I want to do. Other than that, I'm hoping to have moved out of my parents' house at some point in the next five years too, have a crumpets little flat to call my own. Or better yet, to share with a partner.

I feel like my post is somewhat less inspirational than others in this topic, I'm not exactly the most ambitious of people...
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Alecat » Tue Jul 28, 2015 2:26 pm

oh, oh dear, it's been 5 years since I decided to tackle my trich and I'm still failing with no noticable progress. Sigh.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by hawkesnightmare » Tue Jul 28, 2015 4:54 pm

Only results I get from googling "trich" is trichomoniasis. Which is...a thing.
daisy: If the UK is worse than the present #5 in the world in terms of GDP come July 1st 2018 I will dye my hair pink.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Kiltman2 » Wed Jul 29, 2015 4:20 am

From the old topic:
Kiltman2 wrote:Hmm, go to university of edinburgh soon.

Try not to perish in some kind of fire.

And yeah.
Boom I'm two for two bee-hatches.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by MobiusReactor » Wed Jul 29, 2015 7:12 am

Boo, Strathclyde is better :P
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Alecat » Wed Jul 29, 2015 10:44 am

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trichotillomania
Actually my problem isn't exactly hair pulling, it's more skin picking, but a lot of it stems from the compulsion to pull out new-hair stubble. They kinda tie into one another and at least with trich I get to call myself a trichster :/

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by kiwi » Wed Jul 29, 2015 3:16 pm

how do you even go about tackling that kinda thing?

real talk: I have super anger issues! I combat them by not giving a crumpets about anything! I still care about and do stuff but in a laid-back way because it turns out my reaction to stress is to HULK OUT which only works in the world of fiction!

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Bonesy » Thu Jul 30, 2015 11:44 am

i wanted to have a job that was different than what i was doing

i have 0 job

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Alecat » Thu Jul 30, 2015 1:22 pm

Kiwi: I dunno. I guess that's why I've made no progress. I've had limited success wearing gloves or headscarves or stuff but all it takes is one moment of absentmindedness or willful belligerence and my efforts get wasted.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by daisy » Mon Aug 03, 2015 1:13 am

Absolutely not. This will initially sound very emo but there's a happy ending.

In 2010 I was stuck in a job I hated and was preparing to move out of my parents' house because I despised living there. At work I had potential - by the end of 2011 I was offered a promotion, starting in June of 2012. Company car and £30k a year. Sorted. In retrospect it all sounds fudge boring, but I was digging it at the time as I didn't know any better. The plan was to simply move up the ladder of life.

But then March 2012 happened. Dad got diagnosed with cancer and was told he would be lucky to make it to Christmas. We had a very love/hate relationship full of extremes, from me genuinely wishing he were dead at some points (seriously, not just in a teenage angst way) to him being my best friend at other points. On the morning of the 23rd of April I got a phone call from my mum while at work. She told me that dad wasn't doing too well and that I should come over immediately. I did so.

It wasn't a pretty sight. He was wandering around high on morphine not knowing up from down. I persuaded him to go to bed and tucked him in. I sat in the chair in the corner and told him to ask if he needed anything. He asked me to read the news to him, so I located his iPad and started reading whatever was on the front page of the BBC to him. After about half a page I stopped to see if he'd react. He didn't. I tried to get his attention again. No response. At 4:30pm he died at home in front of me. I felt his hand go cold and then I saw his skin go white. From that moment, everything fudge changed. It changed to a soundtrack of my mother's hysteric screaming out of a horror film.

I tried to go back to work. I really did, but I couldn't. I would randomly start crying and the quality of my work decreased. In June I attempted suicide while on the phone to the Samaritans, and I don't really remember what happened after that but I was put in hospital to have my stomach pumped. Along with that, I got a sick note from my doctor and went on long term sick leave. (I think I'm still technically an employee and could go back anytime, haha.) Once I got out, I developed a major drinking problem - 2 bottles of wine a day with several cans was normal. I think I started to offload on WWN a lot during this time.... thanks for putting up with me and helping me out. I genuinely don't think I'd be alive without you lot. A year of trying to figure out what the fudge I'm doing with my life followed. My mother got worse and worse too, and I guess it's pretty hard to watch your eldest son tear himself to shreds. My relationship with her is slowly mending itself, but I miss my old mum. I really fudge do.

Long story short, and after a lot of advice from Treed, I decided to go back to school. After a year of studying in Reading, I moved to Oxford a year ago (gone by so fast!) and here we are. Don't get me wrong, I love it, but here's how small talk usually goes now:

"Ooh, so what are you doing at uni?"
"Politics."
"Here are my opinions."
"Cool. Hey the weather's not bad is it?"

Recently I've got really into MBTI / Myers Briggs and, while I know it's really not very scientific, it's really helped me understand myself. I guess self-improvement (or maybe self-repair if you're cynical) is what I'm all about now. The idea of working 9-5 mon-fri is a life of fudge boredom to me, so I'm trying to save up money to buy a house when I graduate, maybe after a Masters. By my calculations, I should have enough for a very nice deposit in 5/6 years time on a 4-bed house. Maybe I'm being way too idealistic, but the plan is to get the place and rent rooms out to friends while working part-time to fill in any gaps in my budget.

During the rest of my time I can get busy with being an INFJ.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Dragonite » Mon Aug 03, 2015 3:19 am

Oh, test. Will take that one later.

Once again, I'm really impressed with how you fought back David. Overall it's a ton of crap you had to go through.

..In a few months I probably experience the politics curse as well. It already happened once, sort of.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by daisy » Mon Aug 03, 2015 7:37 am

Dragonite wrote:..In a few months I probably experience the politics curse as well. It already happened once, sort of.
Once you study socialisation (something you should do early on) you'll never argue/debate politics in a non-trolly way ever again with the vast majority of people or take any of their opinions seriously. Even your own opinions.

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Dragonite » Mon Aug 03, 2015 8:27 am

The two lessons I had already gave me some extra insight on how skewy things can be, so I think I know what you mean. Going to be a fun ride..

Do you mind if we catch up sometime with facebook chat or something soon?

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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by daisy » Mon Aug 03, 2015 11:36 am

Wait until they inevitably make you write a couple thousand on how you were socialised, and therefore question everything you'd ever thought about everything.

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Linkman
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Re: So, did you reach where you saw yourself five years ago?

Post by Linkman » Mon Aug 03, 2015 10:56 pm

I'm happy to hear that, Boggy. :)
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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