YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Sat May 02, 2015 3:26 am

By the way, anybody I talk to while I'm drunk: I am not an alcoholic nor do I drink too much! I just get awfully chatty when I do :P.

And if I talk to you drunk it means I like you! Also it was probably really late here and not too late for you due to TIMEZONES.

This public service announcement is a pre-emptive strike to those of you who might believe I have a drinking problem after I PARTAY tonight and inevitably chat you up.
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Narts
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Narts » Sat May 02, 2015 4:48 am

It's may day, a drinking problem is to be expected, no?

I only just recovered from last night

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by monkymeet » Sun May 03, 2015 1:00 am

if you're recovering from last night

that means you ddin't drink enough
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Narts
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Narts » Fri May 15, 2015 4:51 am

This band is garbage

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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Fri May 15, 2015 1:31 pm

YOU MAY ALSO POST IN THIS TOPIC WHILE TIPSY
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Fri May 15, 2015 1:34 pm

Had a drink of Grants today.

Thought of Kilty. Felt bad. The whiskey did soothe the pain, but still.
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Sniffit II
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Sniffit II » Sun May 17, 2015 6:35 am

I FOUND THE BOOK I WANRT TTO ART IN BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO ART

Uh

CHillies!

YAY
i don't know what a bishop ninja is but if it can still move diagonal without being seen it's got my vote - Pkdragon

FEAR ME, FEAR THE FIRE THAT BURNS IN MY BALLS, VERIDIAN FOREST! - Dragonite

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Sniffit II » Sun May 17, 2015 7:15 am

My housemate found some friscuit bosons. This is the most epic session of sessioning ever.


They are bosons; they have integer spin.
i don't know what a bishop ninja is but if it can still move diagonal without being seen it's got my vote - Pkdragon

FEAR ME, FEAR THE FIRE THAT BURNS IN MY BALLS, VERIDIAN FOREST! - Dragonite

Vote Sniffit for Space Dictator.

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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Fri Aug 07, 2015 4:05 am

Yo Kilty, I bought this one:

Image

Is it any good?
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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DieselPheonix

Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by DieselPheonix » Fri Aug 07, 2015 4:34 am

Is it strange if I just like the containers? Perhaps put some flowers or incense in them? Regular beverages tend to have plain aesthetics by comparison.

That box has a crease in it, however.

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kiwi

Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by kiwi » Fri Aug 07, 2015 11:52 am

dp go home you are not drunk!

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Kiltman2
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Kiltman2 » Sat Aug 08, 2015 3:54 am

Ah nice Linky - Old Parr is I think an overseas exclusive: it's actually pretty hard to get on these shores so I've never actually tried! I've heard good things though, usually from South Americans who swore it was the best whisky ever, "even better than Jonny Walker Red!"

I would then pour them some single malts and blow their minds.

That was a fun job.

But the Old Parr - v interesting! Lemme know what you think and how it compares to other Whiskies you've tried :)

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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Sat Aug 08, 2015 5:59 am

It is tasty, but a tad too light I think? It feels like it should have a stronger flavor. But I'm no whisky connoisseur :P
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Sniffit II
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Sniffit II » Sat Aug 15, 2015 6:09 am

WHERE'S MY MOTHAFLIPPIN' HYPOTENUSE! I GOT SOME SPAGHETI FOR FOODS.
i don't know what a bishop ninja is but if it can still move diagonal without being seen it's got my vote - Pkdragon

FEAR ME, FEAR THE FIRE THAT BURNS IN MY BALLS, VERIDIAN FOREST! - Dragonite

Vote Sniffit for Space Dictator.

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Kiltman2
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Kiltman2 » Sat Aug 15, 2015 8:30 am

Hey Linky - it's all about what you enjoy! The only difference between someone who enjoys whisky and a connoisseur is time, money, and liver rot usually. But it does sound like you've picked up quite a light, smooth Blended Whisky. These are great! They are especially good alongside mixers - super simple, throw in ice, half whisky, half either ginger beer or coconut water (quite popular with whisky in your part of the world, so I hear?) and you will have a FANTASTIC time.

I'm not one for pushing mixing whisky - I think it can often stand up on its own, but I reckon if you're after something with a bit more kick, using simple but effective (read: boozy) mixers are a good shout.

I'm not sure if I've explained this on WWN before, I'm a little too lazy and drunk to explore my history - BUT the difference between Blended Scotch and Single Malt! And all the rest of it.

SIT TIGHT KIDDIES, THINGS ARE GOING TO GET LONG WINDED.

1st thing first (cos I've been asked stupider things, like what time is the One O'Clock gun? #EdinburghJokes) Scotch = made in Scotland, is a type of whisky, which is ostensibly a grain liquor which has been matured in barrels. That is a generic description of whisky, Scotch whisky is a protected way (and location) of making this particular drink, like how Champagne can only be grown and made in the Champagne region of France, and why the fizzy wine I make in my basement is not "legally champagne" and "dangerous to humans" or some BUREAUCRATIC crumpets

There are basically TWO different types of Scotch Whisky:
GRAIN WHISKY and
MALT whisky.

MALT whisky is made from Malted Barley. To Malt barley, you have to soak it in warm water for a few days to trick it into growing. Then, to thwart the little planty buggers, you blast it with hot air to stop them growing! Truely humans are the master of all species on this earth.

This process encourages the plant to start germinating, and create various sugars and enzymes. (I might be wrong here, but YOLO) this comes in handy later---

Then the wet, soggy mass of crumpets is dried out either by just plain hot air, or they burn PEAT which is basically a type of boggy coal. They would especially burn peat in the old days because, lol, that was before electricity and peat was the only fuel source - particularly on tree sparse Western Isles of Scotland. However, peat gives off beautifully phenolic smoke which imbues the barley with a smoky flavour.

(If ever, EVER you taste smoke in a Scotch Whisky - it's because of peat smoke. DOn't let anyone tell you different - you're beautiful the way you are <3)

Only like...10% of barley is dried with peat smoke these days, I think. It's expensive, peat is a finite resource (Netherlands has run out of theirs LOL) and is only determinable at certain levels. But yeah.

SO the barley has been dried somehow, then we grind it down into something called GRIST which is like a rough flour. Then, the grist is made into MASH by running various levels of hot water over the grain. For science nerds, it's to strip as many sugars off the grains as possible. All the leftovers from this process are high in protein and other nutrients are fed to cows, sheep and american tourists.

We have a sugary liquid called WORT, nae warts you get on your fingers and fanny or whatever. You add yeast to that crumpets, and you get fudge magic. The yeast (bakers, distillers or [HOLD] to be specific) converts those sugars into ALCOHOL and baby, you've got a stew brewing!*

*Yeah, I know what you're thinking - super similar to beer. We're more restricted in our ingredients: beer can use rice and piss and whatever goes into Budweiser, but ostensibly whisky is distilled beer. Like Brandy is distilled wine, and my life is distilled sadness.

After FERMENTATION, you have a strong beer of 5-9% basically. It tastes like crumpets. Like fusty old wellies, or old man arse cracks, or mushrooms grown on a damp beach towel. I have had some and yeah - it's nae good. However, we're not interested in beer - we're interested in WHISKY

So you stick the beer like liquid (called low ales... I think. I'm now a dair few glasses of wine down) into a copper pot still (have to be copper stills to make Scotch. WHy? YOUR FACE IS why (also chemical reasons, catalyzes nicer molecules for flavour)) which is then heated to roughly 80oC either by external fires or elements within the still.

80oC (In farenheit, that's "fudge you learn a decent temperature measuring system, dickhead" degrees) means ethanol will evaporate but not all the water, so encourages the more volatile ethanol to be distilled. After one distillation ~20% alcohol, after two ~50-70% depending.

Irish whiskey tends to triple distill, because it takes them three tries to get it right!!! #zing, banging banter. No but srs, it gives them an extra lightness and smoothness to their spirit, because it they were to distill they would end up in Vodka territory. Tru fax

SO then they take that spirit and stick in an oak barrel for at least 3 years. Has to be 3 years, not a day less - otherwise it's not Scotch! Not allowed, by God or somehting idk.

Often those barrels have been used before either in Bourbon (90% of barrels used to mature Scotch, leaves soft sweet Vanilla and honey) orShery (like, 8-9% and gives spicy, rich characteristics)

Right, so that was MALT whisky. SINGLE means it comes from a single place-ie a single distillery. Glenmorange, Malcallan etc are made at one distillery from malted barley, hence SINGLE MALT.



GRAIN whisky, on the other hand is made from lots of different grains (clue's in the name, crumpets), wheat, maize, 10% barley for enzymes etc made in a massive, 12 storey high still called a COFFEY STILL, or a CONTINUOUS STILL which makes 10 bottles of whisky per second.

Compare that to Malt Whisky, which uses batches and pot stills is like, 10ml a second? But you can see the great imbalance here, and also the great solution.

Not long after the Coffey Still was invented (Mid 19th Ventury) some smart fudge (I think his name was Usher? Andrew Usher? He invented green stripe or some crumpets) mixed grain whisky which was basically mass produced but also crucially quite light and smooth with Malt whisky! At the time, malt whisky was mega strong and harsh, so combining the two meant a nice compromise between economics and taste, a nice moderation of flavours which was more suiting to palates outside of Scotland and hence began Scotch popularity,

Geez Kilty, you've been drunk and talky for a while WELL I AM WINDING UP SHUTTIT WANKSTAIN

Any combination of Scotch whisky from multiple distilleries is a blended whisky - if there is a whisky which comes from more than one place, then it is a blended whisky

If you mix together 3 malt whiskies, you end up with a Blended Malt (cos it's all made from malt whisky)) and you end up with something like MOnkey Shoulder

If you have just one grain whisky, it's a Single Grain like Camron Brig.

If there is a mix of grain and malt whisky, you simply have a BLENDED whisky, which as described is a nice mix between the soft smoothness of grain and the flavour and virbancy (and cost lol) of malt whisky.


So... try a single malt?

...

That was a lot of effort for little payoff.


reminds me of my sex life ahahaa
hhaaa


ha.

I haven;t had sex in a year

*drops mic*

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Kiltman2
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Kiltman2 » Sat Aug 15, 2015 8:33 am

fun fact about old parr i just remembered i think he bossed the open at st andrews golf course loads cos he was an utter lad, not cos there wasn't a tiger woods around then or anything no those are just LIES

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by hawkesnightmare » Sat Aug 15, 2015 11:13 am

PROTIP: while the above was entertaining and informative on its own, it is much more fun to read in a Scottish accent that gets drunker as the post goes on.
daisy: If the UK is worse than the present #5 in the world in terms of GDP come July 1st 2018 I will dye my hair pink.

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Sat Aug 15, 2015 11:56 am

I will definitely buy a single malt next time. Thank you sensei Kilty.
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:40 pm

IT IS SPRING HERE SO DRINKS FOR WARM DAYS ARE THE NORM!

Ever had Sangría (Spritzers)??? That's red wine + fruit + something + a dash of brandy! It's sweet and wonderful and the ladies love it and I love the ladies who love it!
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Xenesis » Tue Nov 03, 2015 5:44 pm

Sangria is like the only time I will drink wine! It's pretty alright!
IST wrote:Even the worst individual needs to discover the joys of a chicken statue that is also a pregnant blonde housewife.

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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Wed Nov 04, 2015 3:40 am

Kiwi your style is contagious! Just look at Xen now!
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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hawkesnightmare
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by hawkesnightmare » Wed Nov 04, 2015 6:16 am

This is horrible! Make it stop!
daisy: If the UK is worse than the present #5 in the world in terms of GDP come July 1st 2018 I will dye my hair pink.

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by scraggypunk » Wed Nov 04, 2015 7:33 am

k
wisdom
"the law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread" - anatole france

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by monkymeet » Thu Nov 05, 2015 4:14 am

DUE TO A LOWERED FREQUENCY OF ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION I AM FEELING MUCH MORE DRUNK FROM THE EFFECTS OF A FEW BEERS
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Hans Stockmann » Thu Nov 05, 2015 11:36 am

Karl's going down a dark road. Send help.

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Xenesis » Thu Nov 05, 2015 11:57 am

AHHH!

Get it away.
IST wrote:Even the worst individual needs to discover the joys of a chicken statue that is also a pregnant blonde housewife.

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Hans Stockmann » Thu Nov 05, 2015 11:59 am

I keep trying to get him to switch his subscription to the AFR but he just won't listen!
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Mysterious Lad

Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Mysterious Lad » Thu Nov 05, 2015 4:00 pm

My password no longer works it seems :/
Maybe I'm drunk but I don't recall drinking anything

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Xenesis » Thu Nov 05, 2015 4:09 pm

Mysterious Lad wrote:My password no longer works it seems :/
Maybe I'm drunk but I don't recall drinking anything
Check your email. (And possibly your spam, the @wwn email addresses get eaten by the filters depressingly often)
IST wrote:Even the worst individual needs to discover the joys of a chicken statue that is also a pregnant blonde housewife.

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by MysteriousLad » Thu Nov 05, 2015 6:46 pm

I'm back!
"i put on my robe and wizard hat" ~Pkdragon
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Welcome to the optimistic world of WWN :D

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Wait, wait, wait.

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Hans Stockmann » Thu Nov 19, 2015 9:23 pm

I've started weaning Karl off the Passion Pop but now he's playing bad card games!

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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Hans Stockmann » Fri Nov 20, 2015 8:53 pm

KARL NO PLEASE STOP

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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Fri Nov 20, 2015 11:38 pm

Linkman wrote:I will definitely buy a single malt next time. Thank you sensei Kilty.
Image

Cheapest single malt I could find! It still ran me a good ~50 usd!

Is this any good Kilters? I tried it and quite liked it!
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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Kiltman2
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Kiltman2 » Wed Dec 09, 2015 7:11 am

I think Glenfiddach is a cracking place to start! Lovely soft fruity flavours of pears and apples with a hint of spice. Part of the Speyside region, which is just a valley with amazing whisky making conditions - over half of all the whisky distilleries in Scotland!

Image

And I uh... read back over my Scotch rant. I uh.

Yeah.

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Pkdragon
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Pkdragon » Sat Dec 19, 2015 5:52 pm

i think im gunna try some of that glenfiddich next time im able to go alcohol-shopping

one of the nice things about having income is that you can occasionally buy nice things for yourself
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Linkman
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by Linkman » Sun Jan 24, 2016 4:31 am

Haven't been drunk in a long time! Jeez, need to rectify this.
"everytime I try to draw xen I end up drawing a kangaroo smoking a cigar while chainsawing a tree" - Deoxy
"I can't believe I'm the only person who voted Stallone. His appeal lies in watching is movies again and again just to hear what the hell he's talking about." - Kilteh

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hawkesnightmare
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Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by hawkesnightmare » Sun Jan 24, 2016 11:35 am

Woo, first drink today. Didn't get actually drunk but it counts.
daisy: If the UK is worse than the present #5 in the world in terms of GDP come July 1st 2018 I will dye my hair pink.

bog2

Re: YOU MAY ONLY POST IN THIS TOPIC WHEN DRUNK

Post by bog2 » Sat Sep 24, 2016 9:58 am

I fell in a hole. Now my ankle hurts. Also Linkin park is amazing. Masterful artists.

No matter how far we come
I can't wait to see tomorrow
No
No matter how far we come I
Can't wait to see tomorrow with youuuu
(You, now I see, every time I close my eyes)

Break it on down yo

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